Today we have a guest post from author Sherri Mills. Her book, “I Almost Divorced My Husband But Went On Strike Instead,” is set for a June 2011 release. Mills has been a hairdresser for over forty years and married for forty-two. After being a “psy-cosmetologist” for her clients, she has sound advice on how to have a great marriage. With the Royal Wedding almost here, Mills shares some of her advice for the future princess, Kate Middleton.
Who better to share marital advice with Kate Middleton than a hairdresser who has followed the inside dramas of hundreds of families for years in the salon? As she preps her hair, she will be adding sage advice for a successful marriage. First and foremost: marry with determination in your hearts that both of you will do whatever is necessary to make your marriage work. Banish any thoughts of “if this marriage doesn’t work, we can always divorce.“ Avoid divorce at all costs.
This may sound simplistic and possibly premature considering the marriage is only about to begin. However, even in a royal wedding, if the couple knew the immediate and continuing costs of divorce — not just financially but emotionally to them and their children (who will be added to the mix) — at the first sign of trouble, they would race to a marriage counselor and do whatever else is necessary to avoid divorce.
As she puts the finishing touches on the princess’ hair, she will add these words of wisdom for a happy marriage for Kate, Prince William, and their future children.
- Start your marriage with a small (or large!) card and write every good quality you see in your prince. Don’t leave anything out, not even something as minor as, “he brushes his teeth every day.” Whenever you are thinking your prince is a jerk, take that card out and read again why you fell in love.
- Don’t expect your prince to read your mind. Express yourself and be specific. Express dis-satisfactions early while they are small so you can speak lovingly. Don’t let them become big resentments.
- Accept imperfection. Perfection is difficult, even for a prince.
- Don’t resent your prince for forgetting your birthday, anniversary, etc. Men do that all the time. They need to be reminded. Remind him!
- Make sure that your need to be right doesn’t sabotage getting the results you want.
- Compromise. It is his royal house too. If a man’s home is his castle, what kind of a castle do you think it would be if he were told on a regular basis how to live in it?
- The grass is seldom greener on the other side of the palace. Too often we might compare our prince’s bad qualities with someone else’s good qualities. Chances are if we compared the bad qualities of both, our very own prince just might be a keeper.
- Post the serenity prayer in different places around the palace: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, to be able to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Very often we spin our wheels trying to change things that are impossible to change in the ones we love.
What advice do you have for the future princess?